HOW TO RECOGNIZE A PORN MOVIE

How to Recognize a Porn Movie

Here I want to discuss the salient features of a porn movie by which it can be recognised precisely. My theory is based on, but not derived from, an illuminating discussion on the topic by Umberto Eco in his instructive “How to” book of 1995.

 I consider Bengali Neo-Bhadralok cinema to be transgression- social, moral, aesthetic and economical. Eco said, “…for the transgression to work, it must be played out against a background of normality.” Therefore these glimpses of pretend normalcy in these films give away their true pornographic nature.

I'll start with the basics:

v If the actors are looking like Hollywood-wannabe, the film is definitely pornography.

v If the film is taking a long time to get to the point which is like on your face and wasting time with meaningless shots, then it is a pornographic waste of time.

v If the rooms are over furnished with ineffectual things, then the film has a pornographic settings

v If two or more characters in the film talking about their emotions in a dimly lit room, you know what scenes censor has deleted

v If the films talks about social issues as a know-it-all, then you can you know what they know most about

v If the film claims that artistic jabberwocky excuses everything, then it is most certainly pornography. This requires no example, go watch a recent Bengali movie, then bleach your eyes.

Well I could give more examples but that meant re-watching these nonsensical mess-terpieces. Spare me. But anyhow, now you know what is a porn and what is not.